Do You See What I See? Christmas 2012
I constantly have these moments in my life, I don’t know why, where something happens, or someone says something to me, or I see something, and the only word I can think of to describe the experience is “bizarre.”
There wasn’t a lot of bizarre happening directly to me this past Christmas break, but oh my goodness, did I see some fantastic things. I would like to share those things with you, if you don’t mind.
I found these little guys in FYE. They look like cute little… puppies, right? EXCEPT NO. THEY ARE BEANS.
Don’t believe me? Here’s one of the videos they originate from:
What I think these little things are supposed to be are random commercials intended to just… throw “fun facts” at their Japanese audience. A friend showed me several of them a couple of years ago, so I just about had a fit when I saw these little plushies sitting on the shelf. While they are not in and of themselves nearly as bizarre (or cute, really) as they are in action, it still pretty much made my day.
Now, I’m not a big C.S. Lewis. I got partway through the Narnia series and then gave up partway into the one about the kid with the talking horse. It just didn’t grab me.
Wandering the sci-fi/fantasy section of the Carmel Clay Public Library, I stumbled upon a book by Lewis that made laugh out loud and immediately send a picture message to several members of my family… who will likely be the only people who will get the reference, a bit from the standup of Brian Regan.
Since hearing this bit, my family (or maybe it’s just me), cannot help but refer to “boxes” as “boxen”, “woods” as “woodsen”, and so on and so forth.
The frog on the front cover, his mouth agape in what could only be true froggy joy, makes everything just a bit better.
#2. Library Endcap
Also while wandering the library, I reached the end of the aisle and happened to look up at one of the shelf labels. I was immensely pleased to see this:
#1. Most Bizarre (and Terrifying) Restaurant Mascot Ever
This was by far the most amazing and bizarre thing I saw during my break, if not in my entire life.
Upon my return to Terre Haute, I decided that I desperately need a “face potato”; that is a barbecued chicken loaded potato from Grand Traverse Pie Company.
Now, I love this restaurant. I love their strawberry rhubarb pie, their artery-clogging loaded potatoes, their hot tea – so far their only flaw is that they (or at least the one near me) carries Pepsi products instead of Coke. Well, I mean, that’s their only flaw aside from their “mascot”, whom I’ll admit is f#%$ing terrifying.
How – how is that good for business? This woman looks like she’s about to step right out of the flipping Twilight Zone! She’d be the peppy, pleasant, but oddly private single homemaker who makes delicious baked goods, but has some terrible secret, and has taken an awful persistent interest in you… and when you’re alone with her, sitting at her kitchen table with the crisp, clean checked tablecloth, she’s slowly going to get creepier… and creepier… and you’re going to get the feeling that maybe, in the interest of your personal safety, you might want to, you know, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE.
Look, all I’m saying is, I don’t care how fantastic in the kitchen she is, if a woman’s looking at me like THAT, there’s probably something a little suspect about her pies. Like maybe they’re made out of the souls of small children.
Posted on January 4, 2012, in Not Writing and tagged boxen, brian regan, c.s. lewis, carmel clay public library, CCPL, Christmas vacation, demonic pie lady, fye, grand traverse pie company, mameshiba, omgwtfbbq, twilight zone. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.