Excellence in Avoidance

Boyfriend had me proofread* his first blogpost the other night. He made a couple typos and misused a semi-colon once (we argued about colon use for ten minutes before he gave up and let me have my way). He started showing me something about WordPress and I told him, “Yeah, I know, I use WordPress, too.”

At which point, he asked, “You have a blog?” and I realized that I was neglecting this thing to the point of ridiculousness.

To be fair, there’s been a lot of things going on**, including me switching my major (again) and realizing that now I don’t have to break my neck in order to graduate by next May. Also, I’m getting used to a new schedule that has arisen since Boyfriend and I got together – I now actually cook almost every night. An actual meal. How did this happen? As LordJazor has observed before, “Kitchens bite Kayla.”†

Things are not half bad, really, and writing is once again commencing – if slowly. I figured out a lot of what was wrong with the novel‡, and I think I actually know what I’m doing this time, which is new. Boyfriend isn’t quite at the point yet where I can use him as a sounding boad for plot changes, character development, and the like, but really only because I haven’t taken the time to sit down and blab to him for four hours about what this novel is about. Eventually I’ll get to it, I figure.

According to the blogging schedule I set up for myself when I first started this a couple of months ago, today I’m supposed to write something about the writing process. Since I haven’t really been writing much since before Valentine’s Day, I can’t really say that I’ve got a lot to say about the writing process, whether in general or my own, specifically.

I suppose there is something I can say about what they call “killing your baby” or whatever, which is when you go in and edit and take out the parts that you LOVE, because they need to come out of the story. I recently did that by completing nixing my two favorite scenes ever from deAngelis, the prologue and the introduction to Asmodeus. I consider both of them my best writing, but when I finally realized what was wrong with the book, I knew I needed to change the premise a little, which required me to change both of these major scenes. Ugh.

I can’t say it didn’t hurt. It was painful. I love those scenes, and I feel like they’re examples of my best writing. But I’m fixing one of the main problems with the book, which is that it just moves too damn slow.‡‡ And if everything goes as planned, then I can change the scenes in a couple major ways that will allow me to keep them in the book, at least partially. Ultimately I think it will be for the best, though, and even if I can’t sneak those two scenes back into the book somehow, I’ll hold onto them and then publish them in an anthology of unpublished stuff that didn’t make the cut, one day when I’m stupidly famous and have nothing to do all day but cross-stitch Marvel characters and read bad fanfiction that people have written about my characters (I’m dreading the St. Michael the Archangel/Colin the hipster vampire slashfics).

So, yeah. A bit less angst, a lot more blood, and hopefully writing gets done.

* – For the record, Boyfriend is by no means illiterate. He uses “who” and “whom” correctly, points out when he is incorrectly using “they” as a generic singular pronoun, and corrects himself every time he ends a sentence with a preposition. Oh god, I’m dating a prescriptivist.

** – And by “a lot of things” I mean, “a lot of things going on that I’ve been avoiding and/or procrastinating*** on.”

*** – It should also be noted that there would not be quite so many things going on if I had not procrastinated in the first place.

† – In fact, I have actual proof of this from this last Saturday. Behold, the bite-marks of a 400 degree oven who closed its jaws about my arm†† at 10am Saturday, when I thought I would do something sweet††† and get up early to make biscuits and gravy.

Kitchens bite Kayla.

†† – Boyfriend looked at the burns an hour later (I’d managed to downplay the pain) and pronounced them first-degree burns, then made me put burn cream on them. The marks were much more impressive Saturday morning, not so much now, four days later. Now it just looks like I fell asleep on a car safety belt or something.

††† – It should also be noted that something about Boyfriend has changed my usual tendency to become a raging Cthulhu beast on the first day of my period, i.e. I get up and make food from scratch instead of trying to… whatever it is that Cthulhus do. I’m never quite sure, by then the rage has pretty much blinded me and obliterated most of my short-term memory.

‡ – Yes, I realize I say that at least once a month.

‡‡ – My solution to this was to replace my deep, tense, character-development-y prologue with one in which one of the main villains is introduced and I kill a good guy off within the first two pages. If that’s not a good pace then I don’t know what is.‡‡‡

‡‡‡ – [(swear words) x 0.25 + (pints of blood spilt)] / (pagecount) x 0.45 = x   If x is less than 1, then you suck as a writer and a human being and you’d best go lie down in a ditch somewhere and just end it now before you get your fail all over everything else.


About Kayla Rose

Leave me alone, let me drink my tea and write my snark.

Posted on April 6, 2011, in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. This may have come up in a previous entry, but I am too lazy to find it. ha ha- anywho, what kinds of planning activities do you do? I am still trying to figure out this whole novel writing business…when I write short stories I just kind of vomit words onto a page and then shape it afterward, but I have a feeling that’s not going to work for me for a longer work. Right now I am bumbling my way through a ton of outlines and character sketches- which are totally working for me because I can kill my babies early on…before they reach full term you could say… (hate that saying btw)- do you have any tips/been-there-done-thats for someone in my stage of the writing process?

  2. this made me laugh… thank you!

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